— C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
Emily Martinez has been a FOCUS missionary since 2012, and has been at NYU for two years. This fall, she will take over as team leader for NYU. She added the following post to her blog on May 18.
I still remember sitting in the chapel at UNL praying for a giant sign from the Lord that I was supposed to say “no” to grad school and continue with FOCUS. “Anything. Just slam a door in yo girl’s face! Please.” (Yes, I do say things like, “yo” to our Lord and Savior. He accepts me as I am.) Anyway. I didn’t get any fireworks in the air, there were no roses, or special deliveries full of the answer. But once I surrendered everything I had left to him in prayer, he did make it clear.
“Think of the people you will meet. The people that I want to place in your life this next year…they are why.”
By the end of my holy hour, I was filled with a deep peace. I was full of gratitude for my year as a missionary at UNL and all of the amazing people I met and had the opportunity to mentor. And also full of gratitude for the people I was about to meet. I couldn’t imagine people better than those He had already graced me with.
I remember thinking, “Lord, all I have to do is send a “yes” in an email and I’m off to England for school. I’m so dang close.” It’s like I was about to take the token leap of faith, and then the Lord turned my head to the right and I saw a crowd of people in the other direction. People whom He had placed there. Strangers that, I knew deep in my heart, would be so very important to me.
I had no clue what I was doing when I finally said yes to FOCUS. To be honest, when they told me NYU, I just prayed they (missionaries included) wouldn’t think I was insane.
However, with each new person I met, I was humbly reminded that I came an email away from never meeting them. Never laughing with them, learning from them, crying with them, praying with them, loving them, or receiving their love in return. That sounds extremely cheesy, but it is was one of the biggest gifts I was granted this year. I can’t imagine my life now without these people. And I thank God every day for giving me the courage to continue with FOCUS.
If I met you this year, praise God. You are so very important to me, and I don’t take our friendship lightly. Thank you for all the ways in which you have inspired me and taught me how to be a better person. I am in awe of how good God is, to have given me the opportunity to meet you, and call you my friend.